protect yourself at home from a loved one

If you are in an abusive relationship or suffering from intimate partner violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or text 1-800-787-3224.  Please stay safe.

Your safety is your number one priority at all times.  Your safety is especially important if you are involved in a relationship with someone who may have a history of harming partners.  Domestic violence cases were estimated to have increased 15-20% worldwide during the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020.

We understand that while these statistics are alarming, you are not alone in what you are experiencing and in the fight to protect others from intimate partner violence.  Here is a quick guide to equip you with knowledge and the skills to keep yourself safe.

Indicating signs for violence

Every relationship is different but there are common traits that you can watch for if you think that your partner may hurt you.  Watch for signs like:

  • Violence in past relationships (romantic partners, children, family, etc)
  • Depression/suicidal ideation
  • Low self-esteem
  • Blaming others for short-comings
  • Cruel to animals
  • Sudden loss of interest in things that once made them happy

If your partner shows one of these warning signs but has not harmed you, continue to watch for other warning signs so that you will know how to best protect yourself.

A couple of red-flag signs are if your partner:

  • Controls and sabotages others in relationships (previous partners, family members, coworkers, etc.)
  • Recent protective order/restraining orders filed against them

Please share these warning signs with someone that you trust will help.

Personal Protection

There is always something that you can do to ensure your safety.  Gavin de Pecker is a leading expert on assessing potential violence.  He says, “Seek and apply strategies that make you unavailable to your pursuer.”

If you need to find protection from your abuser, try any of the following:

  • Leave the situation and get to a safe, secret location
  • Contact your local shelter
  • Prepare a safety plan with the help of family, friends and professionals
  • Learn federal and state laws regarding domestic violence
  • Document injuries and events with pictures and journals
  • File for a restraining order
  • Remove weapons from the household
  • See a doctor to treat any injuries

In the event that you need to protect yourself from your abuser, here are 5 easy self-defense moves to know:

  1. Straight punch
  2. Front kick to the groin
  3. Knee kick
  4. Defense against bear hug
  5. Defense against choking

Texas has gun laws in place to protect you from your abuser.  These laws protect protect family, household members, dating partners and victims of stalking, trafficking and sexual assault.  To learn more about Texas gun policies in regards to domestic violence, use the following resources:

Other Resources

www.mosaicmethod.com

The MOSAIC Method was created by Gavin de Becker to assess potential threats and violence in different settings like home, work or school.  Use the MOSAIC Method to evaluate your situation and learn how to work through it.

www.womenslaw.org

WomenLaw.org has plain-language legal information for victims of any kind of abuse.  Learn what laws your state has in place to protect you at home and in the courtroom.  You can learn more signs of abuse, communicate with an expert with the email hotline and you can quickly exit the site if you might be in danger searching for help online.

National Sexual Assault Online Hotline operated by RAINN

Chat with a licensed support specialist and be reassured that your personal information will be safe.  Their professionals will provide you with support, information, advice or a referral.

texaslawhelp.org/article/protective-order-fact-sheet

Learn more about what laws are in place in the state of Texas that you can utilize to protect yourself from your abuser.

Contact local shelters in your city for more help.  San Antonio shelters include:

Attorneys at Whitley Law Firm are available to provide you with legal advice and file restraining orders against your abuser.  Contact our attorneys today for immediate help.  We will make your safety our number one priority.

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